2SLGBTQIA+

Domestic violence or intimate partner violence can happen in any relationship. Often times, domestic violence is only discussed within a hetero-normative, binary context. However, we know that individuals identifying as female, individuals within the 2SLGBTQIA+ community, and Indigenous individuals are at higher risk of violent victimization. Violence is related to power and people who have less power can be more vulnerable to violence because they are an easier target, because they are less likely to be protected or are more likely to be blamed, or because they may have less places to go to get help. Social and legal stigma of being LGBTQ2S+ broadens significantly the scope of abusive tactics available to an exploitative partner. These tactics often include taking advantage of an individual’s gender representation or sexual orientation.

Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) Definitions & Terminology

Here are some definitions and examples to help identify unhealthy or abusive relationships for 2SLGBTQIA+ people. If you are experiencing abuse in your relationship, call/text 519-752-4357 or chat online at www.novavita.org/chat. You can also find helpful tips for safety planning here.

Intimate Relationship – Involves physical and/or emotional closeness and openness between two individuals, regardless of the length of the relationship. 

Intimate Partner Violence – Refers to any behaviour within an intimate relationship that causes physical, psychological or sexual harm to those in the relationship. Such behaviours can include any combination of the following: 

• Physical violence such as hitting, punching, kicking, slapping 
• Psychological abuse such as intimidation, belittling, humiliation 
• Sexual violence such as forced intercourse and unwanted sexual touching
• Coercive control includes various controlling behaviours such as isolating a partner from their family and friends, restricting their access to resources, and controlling their finances
• Stalking is a pattern of threatening or harassing tactics that causes an individual to fear for their health, safety, or well-being

Closeting – Forcing a victim to hide their trans or sexual minority status from others by overtly demanding or pressuring the victim to remain quiet about their status.

Outing – The opposite of closeting. Disclosing a victim’s trans or sexual minority status to others, either directly by telling people, or indirectly by forcing the victim to show public signs of affection like hand-holding and kissing.

Threats – Threats to out the victim’s trans or minority status, threats against the victim or victim’s family, and threats of self-harm or suicide.

Identity Abuse – Abusers may use a victim’s marginalized social status to control or shame them. Examples include using a transgender person’s birth name or former pronouns without permission.

Withholding Medical Treatment – Stopping victims from seeking or continuing medical treatment needed to express their gender identity.

Other Anti-Sexual Minority Psychological Intimate Partner Violence Tactics – These can include accusing a victim of not being lesbian, gay, or bisexual enough, telling bisexual victims they are not a “real” sexual minority, accusing a sexual minority victim of making the abuser a sexual minority, etc.

(Source: Canadian Centre for Gender & Sexual Diversity: ccgsd-ccdgs.org/resources)

Gay – Identifies as a man who has or desires to have relations (emotional, intellectual, spiritual and/or physical) with another self-identified man. With less frequency, it is also used to describe all people who do not fit a heterosexual orientation or as a designation of the rainbow community as a whole. 

Lesbian – Identifies as a woman who has or desires to have relations with another self-identified woman. 

Bisexual – A person who has or desires to have relations with someone of the same or other gender. 

Trans – An umbrella term to describe a person who displays any type of gender diversity or who undergoes gender and/or sex transition. 

Transgender – A person whose gender identity and gender expression do not align with their sex assigned at birth. 

Two-Spirit – An umbrella term used by Indigenous people in the LGBTQ2S+ community. For some, this term reflects the embodiment of both a masculine and feminine spirit. However, this is not the case for everyone and not all LGBTQ2S+ Indigenous people identify as two-spirit.

Polyamory – The practice of or desire for intimate relations with more than one partner, with the knowledge and consent of all partners involved. 

Questioning – A person who is unsure of their sexual orientation and/or gender. 

Queer – The term was reclaimed by the LGBTQ2S+ community and is now used to describe all people who do not fit a heterosexual orientation. As the term has its roots as a slur, someone should not be called queer without their consent. 

Cisgender – People whose gender matches their sex assigned at birth. 

Intersex – People who were born with anatomy that can not be medically classified as belonging to a single assigned sex. 

Asexual – A person who has: 1) no sexual attraction, 2) a lack of emotional connection to sexual acts, but may still engage in sex with partners, 3) a lack of desire for sex, though they may engage in sexual acts with their partner. 

Aromantic – Little to no romantic attraction to others. 

Demisexual – A lack of sexual attraction unless it is accompanied with a deep emotional connection. 

Pansexual – Has or desires to have relations with another person, regardless of sex, gender identity or gender expression. 

Nonbinary – Any gender identity that does not fit the male/female gender binary.